A Woman's Guide to Breast Augmentation
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Sara's Story

Breast Implants and Breast Augmentation Stories from our Visitors

If you have already read Nicole's Story, you have a pretty good idea what this section of the website is all about. After several women emailed their breast augmentation stories to us, we thought it would be great to have women share their full-length recovery stories after their breast implant surgeries for everyone's benefit. Thankfully, many women have contributed, some in more detail than others.

Here are the stories of our visitors. Many names have been changed for privacy. Where appropriate, there is detail in parentheses so you can decide if you are interested. Click on a name to read.

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Breast Augmentation Restored Self Confidence and Relationship

I know this is long...but I felt I needed to tell my story...for those that felt this way...there are those of us that truly understand the feeling associated with your breasts, and how they can affect your life...sorry it’s so long...

At 27 and 29 I had my children. I am 39 now. I am 5'5", and my weight was always 122 -128. It went up and down over a year, ya know Xmas, summer, menstruation...I never cared cause I still looked good and felt good. I love to eat, but I have always been physical, so was always active and didn’t have to TRY to keep my weight in line. I don’t have a sweet tooth, but I am a carboholic, and have the appetite of a trucker....Where is the pasta????

So for my first born, I went to 185lbs, and my second to 165lbs (nausea and running after firstborn helped me this time). I never cared AT ALL when I was pregnant, I was on the 'seafood diet'...ya know...you SEE FOOD, so you eat it.....LOL...and I was a happy fat pregnant lady! (My active life assured me I could take at least most of it off after pregnancy).

After the 2nd born, I got down to 138lbs...I had never been this weight, but I looked good enough. Everybody thought I looked great, but inside, I held a secret.

I wanted to go back to roughly where I used to be...say under 130lbs. I FELT fat...I didn’t care what the scale said...I FELT FAT! And UGLY! I no longer liked my body, and didn’t like this "trapped-in-another-body feeling. I didn’t look at my body in a mirror, I never touched my body anymore, and I hid my body from my hubby (changed and showered alone, and turn out those damn lights, please!!!!). I loved to make love, but hated him for touch my body. It was a battle in my head like...touch me...oh yah, there is okay, but not there.......touch me...no, don’t...not there either...So it was hard to feel the same as I did in bed like "in the good old days..." Here comes the worst part...my breasts...omg, my breasts.....

I knew I could lose the 10lbs or so, but I didn’t want to, because of my breasts. My B full breasts, were and empty, saggy, barely a B. I felt like I was a National Geographic African woman. I HATED THEM!!!! I never talked about it to anyone. How I could I tell my husband...I love you, but don’t touch or look at my breasts EVER AGAIN. I knew he would say, I love you, you are beautiful, and he would truly mean that...as much as any loving man can (he is truly wa wonderful man). But in my head I am saying..."yah sure! As if...they are disgusting, if you didn’t love me...you would agree. The only reason they aren’t DUSGUSTING IS BECAUSE YOU LOVE ME! I couldn’t stand to even wash them in the shower, I never looked, getting a glance in the mirror was bad enough! So anyway, I knew if I lost 10lbs, they would be 10 TIMES EMPTIER, and hang all the more. I guess I will die like this I thought. I will never like my body, I will always SOMEWHAT enjoy my sex life, this is my life now I guess...

I lived like this till I was 36. And I was very sad inside, but always smiled because I had too many things to be grateful for...health, my children, and wonderful husband. I kept my heartache a secret...until I just couldn’t take it anymore.

Inside I was dying...literally. I didn’t even know who I was anymore. I had a serious $ career in cosmetics, traveled and KNEW WHO I WAS...then BAM, I got married, had 2 kids, gave up my career to stay home with them.....and now....what happened to ME???? Who the hell am I? I am not that other person from before, I am new and better in some ways (a mom), but I gave up all of me to give to my family for 9 years....and it was like I was in the dark, and someone turned on the light after 9 years, and I’m going...WHO IS THIS PERSON...?????

So I began my journey of self discovery...I searched my soul...to find who I was now, and what I wanted for my life. I was starting to feel bitter inside, at all that I gave up, and then guilty for feeling that way. So I learned a lot about me, and started to learn about me all over again...to get to know me. whoever that was...

I started to change things...ensure more time with my hubby, taking 30 minutes a day for myself (with kids your lucky if you can have a private pee sometimes), taking better care of me, inside and out...and I felt better. I started to have a few glasses of wine, and have better sex with my hubby...needed the wine to shut my brain off, so I could enjoy it more. I started to remember the FANTASTIC SEX we used to have, and how I didn’t feel the need to drink to have sex back then...

Then from eating better the pounds started to come off (and my fears were coming true). Now what? So, I still had sex, but it was great on one hand, and terrible on the other. My weight got down to 125lbs, and I looked awesome! Clothes fit great! I got my hair highlighted, and I looked better to everyone than I had for a long long time....except to me.

I struggled with this for a year, and wanted to change things for me. I knew if I was a happier person inside, I would be a better mom, and a better wife. I started reading about implants...which I never considered ever in my entire life...and I dreamed of just being the 'B' ME again... I didn’t want to be Pam Anderson, but this National Geographic woman had to go...I cannot live like this...feeling mutilated by pregnancy...feeling bitter about my sacrifices. I thought...I am 36, have a very full life now, my kids are 7 and 9, I have LOTS of years left I think...but I cant stand this....HIDING from my lover, and HIDING from my own body.

I started to masturbate again, which I hadn’t done for years, and I couldn’t touch them. I had a harder time reaching O because I couldn’t be free with my body even with myself...it was pathetic.

So I decided I was getting xxxxxxxxxxe hell or high water...but I haven’t even told my hubby about my SECRET, let alone implants... His view on implants was always neutral...he could care a less one way or the other, just didn’t figure young women with normal breast should try to be Pam Anderson really...but for cancer victims he had understanding....So what the hell do I do now...

I had to tell him how I felt, and make him understand, so he would support me on this...I needed this...for ME! I WANTED MY BODY BACK AND MY LIFE BACK!!!! FOR MEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I gave and gave and gave, and I want just a bit of a life back before I die!!!!!!!!

So I brought it up casually, and felt him out, when we saw implants somewhere...and he had the same views as I discussed...hmmmmmm. Then when he would remark "what’s the matter...your tense" when he touched my breasts, say on the couch while watching a movie, I would lie, and say nothing...until finally he got out of me "I don’t like them, in fact, I hate them"...Of course he said all the RIGHT things, but he could not change a thing. It came up this way off and on for a few months, and one afternoon I snapped....really snapped!

I spilled my guts...my soul to him...and bawled my head off.... and told him how I really felt, about everything...all the things that ripped me apart to even THINK, I said to him OUT LOUD!!! I cried.....He cried for me.

So you know men, he said, you can’t go on feeling this way, he wanted to fix me, like he fixes everything else around here. It drove him nuts that "It doesn’t bother me, I love every inch of you" didn’t make ANY DIFFERENCE to me.

Then I dropped the BOMB. The IMPLANT BOMB. His jaw hit the floor, his blood pressure went through the roof, and he was scared he would lose me. “NO! NOOO!"

I shared with him my vision of our life, and we remembered what it was like...the 2 of us, and that we both wanted to continue our love affair forever, together...and I explained that I will NEVER be able to participate fully unless I change this situation for myself...

After a few longer, painful discussions, he finally understood. I asked him..."If you smashed the car, would you get the damage fixed, or would you drive it around like that?" He said "Sure, I would repair it, of course!" I asked, "Since you repair everything...you would fix what you could and then bring it to wherever to fix what you couldn’t, right?" He said "YES, that’s right." I told him, "I am the car, and I had 2 accidents and I have done what I can, and I’m driving myself to the repair shop". His shoulder shrank down, and he knew I would go no matter what. I told him, I would sell my beloved motorcycle if I had to pay for it, and he was shocked. He said, "No, we will find a way to pay for it."

Ultimately, before my surgery, he did understand the depth of my pain. He read endlessly about implants (safety and complications), went to the plastic surgeon for all of my appointments, and was with me every step of the way. He was my nurse, and cared for me post op, worked and cared for the kids and house for an entire week. He didn’t care what they were going to look like (just not big and fake looking)...he just wanted his wife back ALIVE and HAPPY after surgery and beyond...

End of story...I had surgery and I have my body back. I walk around naked, and love myself. I always loved the inner me, just hated what was on the outside. Nobody locally here knows, or notices, because I wore pushups, and now they are boobs instead of a padded pushup. I didn’t do it to get attention; I did it so I could live in my body....happily. I cannot describe how it has changed my life.

We are deliriously happy, hubby too. He says now, I should have done this for myself years ago, when I started to feel this way. I should have talked to him, and I wouldn’t have to have suffered alone for all those years. He sees me bounce through life, like I was 20! My kids see a Mom bubbling with enthusiasm. My marriage has strengthened tenfold. I worship the ground my husband walks on...he is more than a soul mate...he is my life partner, and I know he loved me before and after, and I will love him always.

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- Sara

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